Sunday, 28 November 2010

Rules for public transport: by me

After several months travelling British style I think I now have the right to comment on public transport rules and etiquette.

If we all follow these basic instructions the world will be a much happier place.

Elderly Women (frail and non-frail)
Now this is easy - everyone who is not elderly or disabled should stand for little old ladies - end of story. It's the right thing to do

Elderly Men (frail)
Again, this is a simple rule, everyone who isn't old and has all their limbs in working order should give up their seats.

Elderly Men (non-frail)
This rule is a little more complicated, and may sound a little sexist.

MEN who are not elderly or disabled should stand up for this group the reason being gentlemen of a certain age don't seem to like taking a seat of a 'lady' no matter how young (children are another matter all together) and will act all chivalrous if offered a space by the fairer sex.

Small School Children
I know some people out there think all children should give up seats for full-fare-paying grown-ups, but it seriously makes me mad when the tiniest of pupils are left to slide around the bus or train. These tots often carry backpacks that weigh as much as they do and being so tiny they can't reach the hand rails. So be an adult and give up your seat!

Pregnant Women
I imagine carrying around a future human all day is pretty tiring and the added size and shape doesn't make standing crammed in with other passengers easy. So unless you are an elderly woman or a frail old man - stand. The same courtesy should be applied to those carrying babies and small children.

If you are standing and the train is full do not open your newspaper. Where do you think your elbows are going? That's right - all up in my face!

Upon entering
Let people OFF the train first - you're not going to get left behind, just be patient, please.

Well, those are my rules. Nothing more, nothing less.

Just don't steal my armrest!

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